I wasn't going to write anything this week. We've been with out Internet for almost 2 weeks now and I just haven't been very productive. So I was planning on using the Internet issue as an excuse to not post anything this week. However, I have to share this with you. So PLEASE excuse any spelling errors or grammar errors or weird set up of this post. I'm writing it from my phone and have no clue how it will actually look on a computer screen.
Now, on to what I am really here to tell y'all about. This past week and a half have been a little hard. Moving to the boondocks has been interesting. I've learned how to deal with being 45mins away from the closest Michaels or Chick-fil-a or Target or anywhere worth going. I've also learned how to deal with not having many friends yet (I am working on it!). And now I'm learning how to deal with being so far out that you don't have very good Internet options. But after all these superficial things I'm learning a lot about myself. I'm spending more time alone than I ever have in my life. It is unbelievably hard and I have cried many times about it. But this has challenged my faith in ways I never thought I would be challenged.
I went to my home church (NewSpring) at the beginning of September when Reed and I were visiting Clemson for the first football game. The sermon that week was about tithing. Nothing special just the typical tithing sermon and how trusting God with your money is a good thing. Reed and I know that. We've been pretty good about tithing since we got married. And when Reed got his new job we set up our tithing with our new church to automatically draft out of our bank account. I was so proud of us, really budgeting and being real grown ups :) but that sermon we heard at NewSpring on September first hit me hard. As the preacher spoke about giving and trusting The Lord with your money he got me hook line and sinker when he said "if you help God build his house he will help build your house". I know that's not so ground breaking everyone has heard it when talking about tithing. But for me it hit hard. Reed and I had been struggling with figuring out how to build our savings account faster. One day in the future we wanna build a home and right now I'm trying to set up a studio. So after the service I looked at Reed and told him that I felt like we needed to give our monthly savings to the church for the month of September.
I felt that Reed and I needed to learn to trust God with all our money not just our 10% that we budgeted to give him. So we got home and I sent the church the $200 that would usually go in to our savings account.
It's not a lot but knowing I wasn't saving up for the things I wanted in the future was hard. But Reed and I both knew we would learn a lot by trusting what we were doing was right.
After that nothing spectacular happened, just normal life spending money daily and me watching our bank account slowly go down until the next pay check. I was waiting on the right time to buy a few tools for my studio. Something I've been waiting to do for what feels like forever (it's been about 2 months but 2 months by yourself feels like eternity!). Then the Internet went out. I was getting frustrated with being so far out in the middle of no where that I can't even get Internet! What is a girl supposed to do with out tools in a studio or Internet to read blogs!?
When Friday September 13th I decided to walk and check the mail. Seems pretty normal and it is. But what I got in the mail proved to me that God is good in every circumstance. I received a graduation gift of $200! I was so excited I almost cried. That was the exact amount Reed and I decided to give to the church on top of our monthly tithing. And it was also the exact amount of the first tool I want for the studio!
Why all the exclamation points? Because with the timing of this gift God proved that He listens and I'm not alone out in the boondocks. That He wants Reed and I to have our hopes and dreams. But I had to trust Him first. I had to learn to give Him everything not just the 10% I planned on sharing.
So I was on cloud nine about it until yesterday. How quickly we forget the blessings being poured out. Yesterday I let myself fall in to the laziness of being alone. Sure I did some dishes and ran by the post office but most of my day was spent sitting on the sofa watching nothing on TV. Then this morning rolled around and I tried to be productive again. Cleaned some painted some and even made muffins and chicken pot pie. But I couldn't help but feel alone, and I hate being alone! So again I decided to go check the mail. Not expecting anything but just needed to be moving!
This time we had loads of junk mail a few invitations and another graduation gift with a sticker reading "take time to dream" and a $50 check.
Lord you are to good to me! I so easily forget your goodness!!!
It didn't even take a week for me to forget everything I learned about His presence and goodness as a father. But instead of letting me struggle with my loneliness he reminded me again that I'm never alone and that he will provide my dreams.
I know it's not huge but to me these 2 little gifts have taught me to stop focusing on my physical place and realize that God is here always! And he hears my desires and wants to give them to me. He is a good father!
I'm so thankful for a God who provides!!!