This isn't the post I had scheduled for today (yes I'm trying to be a good blogger and write posts a head of time ) but I felt like this needed to be addressed sooner than later :)
So yesterday was a hard day. I don't know what it is other than lack of a schedule but I get really frustrated some days with feeling worthless and very unproductive. It doesn't matter how many projects I have going on it still creeps up on me. It hits me hardest when I am trying with all my might to figure out what I am doing here. This move has been awesome, I have more time for projects than ever, but that time is eating me up! I don't like not bringing in money for our family, Reed can more than support us but I feel guilty with every trip to Lowes.
So yesterday was hard. It hit me like a 2x4. I looked for jobs, and looked for jobs, and researched how to better my blog and Etsy shop. Then I cried because it all seemed so far away. Reed came in for lunch which made it worse. I was just really struggling with being patient.
I posted this as my thankful-gram yesterday knowing that the time I have been blessed with should be taken as a BLESSING. When else am I ever going to have this much time to myself to do MY projects?! Then I made myself be productive and had my music blaring.
At first I listened to Arms Open Wide by Hillsong for like an hour. This line is really what I wanted to sing over and over.
"Take my moments and my days Let each breath that I take Be ever only for you oh God"
-Hillsong United
I needed that reminder that my moments and my days should always be praising to Him. And that includes the unproductive and hard ones.
Then I stumbled upon Yet Rejoice by Rachel Kelly. First it's beautiful. She has an amazing voice so its just a fun song to sing really loud while working on a project :) But mostly everything she said is exactly what I needed. I'm not gonna try to explain so here is the entire song,
Praise the Lord, O my soul!
Do not faint within me
Do not grow cold
Praise the Lord, O my soul!
Forget not all He's done
Nor what He's told
Yet rejoice, rejoice, rejoice
Remember His goodness
Yet rejoice, rejoice, rejoice
Stand firm on His goodness
And the hope that you lost
Is restored by His promise
When your joy breathes its last He gives
Live in abundance
And the tears that fell fast
Are soaked up by His kindness
When your courage hangs worn, He grants
Strength in abundance
Just beautiful. Needless to say my day got better after that. I became productive, my heart wasn't so worn. And I kid you not just moments after the 5th time i sang through this song I got 2 Etsy orders :) God is the best provider!!
And then as I was sitting here writing the post that was meant to be for today I heard the tractor pull up. I didn't think anything of it because, well its become normal now :) But I realized it was going REALLY slow so I looked out the window and what did I see??
A STUDIO!!
I literally jumped for joy, ran out side and video taped the entire process :)
It may not look good now but I love it and I can't believe that I have been given a 12x12 space to call my own!
So what I wanted to share was this. God is good. He wants to bless His children and He will bless you when you give Him your life. Your ENTIRE life, that means frustrations with money, and trusting Him with time. I can't explain any other way how a day full of tears and heart ache ended with shouts of joy and praise!
Literally PRAISE THE LORD :)
Literally PRAISE THE LORD :)
